It was such a relief to have my Gracious Guest take care of that odious Hall Closet that I decided to go to our bedroom next. I am remembering an old song: You always hurt the one you love, the one you shouldn't hurt at all...so if I broke your heart last night, it's because I love you most of all...."?
I guess I am a lot older, because the lines surely seem ridiculous to me now. Yes, we do hurt the ones we love, but I seem to hurt people I don't particularly love, even strangers!
On the other hand, I do know how easy it is to hurt the ones we love. It is so convenient, there are so many opportunities, and the risk is so much lower. We can't tell off our boss, or the preacher, usually, but unloading on our spouse is almost a by-product of being married. It is part of what we expect!
I remember once saying something really awful to Art. Not only was it hurtful, it wasn't even true! (I am so thankful I can't remember exactly what it was that I said -- but I remember being very ashamed.) After stewing and feeling guilty for a couple of hours, I came back to him and gave a deeply-felt apology and request for forgiveness. He looked at me and said, "I don't know what you are talking about. I don't remember you saying anything like that!"
Home free!
These days many people find the habit of spouting off and unloading on our spouses is almost impossible to control.
When my Omnipotent Guest came into our bedroom, He could see photos of us taken at important events or recalling special vacations and times together; our Bibles in our reading areas, and typical homey items other couples have.
He nodded at the pictures and acknowledged that we loved each other very much.
He told me He understood how hard it was to show constant love and respect to those we live with. How the struggles of each day weigh heavily on us and how easy it is to lash out and accuse. And how hard it is to defend ourselves form these unwelcome attacks.
And how hard it is in our culture with its ungodly worldview to keep our vows to each other.
Faithfulness to each other is such a profoundly simple concept! God is faithful to us. We are to be faithful to Him. Since marriage mirrors and conceptualizes His faithfulness to us, we are to be faithful to our mates. As God loves the church, we are to love each other. As God is faithful to His church, we are to be faithful to each other. What could be easier to understand?
I guess the problem is not in the understanding. It's in the obedience part.
We are to keep our promises and commit ourselves to each other, just like we do to Him. He has never been unfaithful to us. We are to mirror that to each other.
Israel is a perfect example (and I guess that's why God left so much of her record for us to observe) of God's faithfulness versus ours. In spite of God's faithfulness to His people, they were, to their continual disasters, unfaithful to Him.
Hosea is a good example. This small book in the Big Book, relates God's way of showing Israel what it means to be faithful, truly faithful, no matter what.
Hosea was directed to show his fellow Hebrews a very hard lesson.
It seems that sometime, probably when Hosea was pretty young, God went to him and asked him to do a hard thing.
"Hosea, I want you to marry a woman who is going to be unfaithful to you, but to whom you are going to remain faithful. You will love her, but she will disgrace your love. I am asking you to do this so I can show My people what My love is like.
"You will be like a living parable. Instead of telling them again how much I love them and how much I cherish My relationship with them (which I have done repeatedly), I now want you to demonstrate it. You will be a symbolic, object lesson.
"It will be sort of like a stage play. You are going to play My part. You will represent God. The woman I will ask you to marry will represent Israel. The reason I am going to let her run away and make you look foolish, is because that is what My people are doing to Me right now in the spiritual marriage I have established with them.
"But no matter what she does, and she will be truly unfaithful to you, more than once, you will remain faithful to her. She will embarrass you. People will pity you and ridicule you because of her actions. They will question what kind of a man would put up with that conduct! Perhaps, they will think, you are weak and powerless. But you will still care for her -- even when she becomes a prostitute and lives in the gutter, you will go to her and bring her back. You will forgive her no matter what she does. There is nothing she can do that will outreach your love for her.
"You are going to show, by example, how forgiving I am. You are going to demonstrate how My love endures forever. Those are not just words My people say when they go to the Temple: Those words, 'My love endures forever,' are an inseparable part of My holy character."
So that is what Hosea did. He married Gomer. She left him and chased after other men. (We would call her some very descriptive names.) He followed her to bring her back. He forgave her. He didn't 'keep a record of her wrongs' (1 Corinthians 13:5).
His love, like God's, was pure and unchanging. It was eternal.
Reminding me how great God's love is helps me understand how important our love for each other is.
Sometimes on TV we see a celebrity confessing tearfully his (or her?) failure to maintain faithfulness to their mate. Often they dab their eyes with a handkerchief, and stumble on their words. We watch them express their guilt and ask forgiveness for their "mistake." I wonder, isn't a mistake what you make in math class? And you use your eraser to remove it and then do the problem correctly? Or in an English paper you delete a wrong word, or change the incorrect spelling, with just a simple 'delete' on the computer? Aren't those "mistakes"?
God tell us that unfaithfulness is not a mistake --- it is a deliberate wrong choice. It is an intentional decision to do wrong. It is not erasable. It is not just an inconvenient situation, or an embarrassing time in our lives. It is an offense to God and a terrible assault on His holy character. It is cosmic treason against the King of the Universe. ('Against thee have I sinned,' said David.)
Unfaithfulness is an act that carries great consequences, far beyond what we can see before us.
My Guest reminded me that He knows how hard it is to live as He wants us to. When something comes up I find hard to handle, "Talk to Me about it," He said. "Let me help you take steps to avoid temptation. Rely on Me and My strength. I will show you ways to control and shape circumstances so that You bring honor to Me."
He also reminded me, "And if you do something to cause you shame and guilt, know I will always love you and will remain with you, right here in your heart-home. Acknowledge what you did and I will help you take steps to avoid it happening again. You will never do anything that can outreach My love for you!"
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